Saturday, February 28, 2009

Time goes by

What a difference 11 weeks make! It is hard to believe that in the past 11 weeks we have gone from this:

To this:

It has been the hardest 11 weeks of my life! I can honsetlysay that without all of your support I think I would have gone insane. I know I have not been very active on my due date club boards and I know I have not been a very good Due Date Buddy, Sorry Sandra. Honestly it is hard for me to go on the board. It is hard to read about everyone's pregnancy and the births of the babies and them coming home. I am jealous of the belly pictures and everyone being tired of being pregnant. So I have to appologize to my ladies on BZ for not being a very good "friend".

The good news is I can see a light at the end of the tunnel now. Soli's nurse has said she thinks Soli will be home in 10 days!

10 days! After all this time I have 10 days to get ready for her to come home. I guess I am now going into my "Nesting" phase. I feel the need to clean everything! Speaking of cleaning I need to get to it. I Only have 9 more days!!

Monday, February 23, 2009


Well I have been slacking lately. Sorry. I am trying to find the delicate balance between all the kids and where I need to be. I need a duplicator so I can be everywhere at once. Plus this week has been trying. OK the updates: Angel Girl has been on High Humidity Nasal Cannula since last Tuesday and doing great! Yes she was off bubbles when I posted my last post. She is now 5 pounds as of yesterday. After our fight with her Dr, She is nippling and ate the entire bottle at both nipplings yesterday! She is still on 3L of O2 at 35% but we are not even trying to wean that down yet. The good news is that the Dr said that if she gets all her feeds down that he will send her home on O2 if that is all that is keeping her there. I think I am just getting tired of the NICU. It has been 10 1/2 weeks and I just want Soli to be mine and not "property of Sutter Memorial" That is what my last post was referring to. I have been feeling more this week like they think she is theirs not mine and I was growing increasingly frustrated. We did have a meeting with the NICU director and her Dr and have come up with a care plan for her and so far so good. She is being Cloth diapered and is nippling 2 times a day. By Tue or wed we should be nippling every other feeding and a few days after that we will go to nippling as tolerated. I can finally see an end to this nightmarish NICU stay.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

I thought her last name was Silva Not Sutter!

I hate the fact that just because your child is in the hospital that we as parents get treated as though they are not ours but actually belong to the hospital. I swear the name on the bands, nameplate and Birth Certificate was Silva NOT Sutter. I guess I will have to go double check. I hate the fact that they do whatever they want whenever they want with my child WITHOUT my consent. I have been looking at transferring her to a different hospital but Tricare says they won't pay unless it is medically necessary. They do not care if I am not satisfied with the quality of care she is receiving at the current hospital. GRRRRR I feel like she is being held hostage! she is 35 1/2 weeks and they are not nippling her!!!!! I am so beyond pissed at the incompetence shown in this NICU over the past 2 weeks! All they are doing is buying the hospital more $$ by going as slow as they are with her. I just want to scream! Do you think they will get the picture if I cross out Silva on the sign on her bed and write Sutter?? I almost want to tell them that since they seem to think she is theirs, to just call me when they decide they do not want her anymore.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

I'm a Big Girl Now!

A Quick peek at my Angel's face after her bath. Look at all that hair!! She is Beautiful!

I am plesantly suprised to let you all know that late last night, weighing in at 4lbs 8 ozs, Miss Soli moved to a big girl crib!
Ok let me back up a bit. I went in the other day when they called to tell me they re-intubated her and noone could tell my why she was intubated except that she had a new nurse and a student nurse at the time. Well I told them they had 2 days to figure it out, prove to me she needed to be intubated or extubate her. Well they figured out she has reflux and that she refluxed causing her sats to drop. Needless to say they put her back on bubbles. She is now in D room because a week ago they exposed room D and B to a baby with RSV. So she got her Synergist shot and has tested negative for RSV.

Other news, Corbin turns 1 on Sat and I am busy planning his party. I will go see Soli this morning and I will bring back pictures of her big girl bed...

Friday, February 13, 2009

Tiny Crocs and 9 Weeks old

OK so a couple of weeks back my mom gave me these keychains of Mini Crocs. She dug through the whole barrel to find a right and a left shoe. So I took them in the other day and Soli wore her first pair of "shoes".

I think she likes them.

Soli turned 9 weeks old last night and here is her Cow picture. She weighs 4 lbs 3 ozs in it..

Despite being on the Vent, Margie let me hold her yesterday. When I picked her up her TCM was at 90 and sats at 80%. While I was holding her her TCM dropped to 68 and she was 90-100%. Now if I could just sit here 24/7 and Margie was on 24/7 we would be home in no time!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

My Angel's Angel, a granddaughter and 4 POUNDS!!!

I was walking in Target and found this on the new release shelves! LOL! I had to take a pic because I though it was funny!

I wanted to introduce you to who I believe to be Soli's Angel.

Margie is Soli's primary nurse and second mom. She is God sent. I know she was placed in our lives and honestly I do not know how I would have survived this long if she hadn't been. She talks to Soli as though she is going to talk back and Soli responds to her amazingly! She is not just some nurse taking care of Soli, she is a Nurse who Lovingly cares for and in my absence mothers her. She responds to 2 people when they call her name. Me and Margie. I do not know how to thank her enough for the care that she gives my daughter. She truly cares about her and it shows everytime she is near her. I am not sure if she follows this blog but I do want to say how amazing she is and to thank her with all my heart. I know Soli feel the love and warmth that radiates from Margie and she has gotten this far because of Margie. She is Soli's Angel!

This week also brought us a new Grandbaby!! Lily Lorene was born 2/9/09 at 3 pm 6 lbs even and 19" long. Yes she out weighs her older aunt!! Tom was able to be there when she was born and though not able to attend I did hear her be born. Almost as good. This Sunday she will be coming to visit Memaw and Papa house for the first time! I cannot wait! Here she is:

Here is the proud new Papa Silva!

Oh and on another side note Miss Soli hit 4 pounds yesterday! She is now 9 weeks old!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

This songs says it all

I added this song to my myspace several weeks back. I have heard it nearly a hundred times yet today when it played on my page I lost it. This is me right now Word for word. I feel like I am in the storm and I am trying to hear him above it. I want to hear him tell me it will all be ok but I can hardly hear him....

"Praise You In This Storm"

I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

And I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
And every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to you
And you raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You

But as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth

On the Vent Yet Again!

I thought we finally turned the corner! But I was awaken at 2:41 am with the phone call telling me Soli has yet again been put on the vent. I am not understanding this since when Tom and I left the hospital at 6 pm she was only on 25% O2 satting well and there was talk once again of a nasal canula in a few days. GAD I am not sure how much more I can stand without going insane! They said she is on very low settings on the vent but still on the vent. Tom cancelled his Army trip and after the Ortho appt for the girls I will be going in to find out what the hell happened...

Sunday, February 8, 2009

SO Sorry. My update and LOTS of PICS!!

Wow the past week has flown by. So much to do and not enough hours in the day to do them. This week has been a good one. Soli is still on Bubbles at 30% O2. She is up to 3 pounds 11 ounces! as soon as she can kick the bubbles she will be in a big girl bed! I cannot wait to hold her and have her face resting on my chest and smell her and not the bubbles!!

This week brough us Good News on the friend front as well. We are all relieved to hear our friend Mary is Cancer Free! We have been praying for her and finally got a Great answer to all of our prayers! Hopefull she can breathe a bit easier and I hope she realizes how much everyone missed her while she was gone.

Also My Cousin is pregnant!! Yea! I am so excited for her! Here is her little bean due in September
This week also brough Soli new visitors. As you know the entire staff at Chick-fil-a in Elk grove has become an extended family to us. This week 2 members of our new family came to visit and hold our little Angel. Kathi and Melissa trecked with me to the hospital and visited with Soli, they even brought the nurses a treat! Oh yea I am the favorate parent in the ward now!!! Well here are some pictures..