Friday, December 19, 2008


I have been trying to keep busy trying to avoid the inevitable. But tonight I had some down time and it hit. I feel so betrayed. My body betrayed me. And in turn I have failed my baby. It was my job to protect her and to keep her safe and for reasons I am not clear of, my body betrayed me and I then failed to do my part for my baby. I should have stayed in the hospital and not moved for anything. Now I can do nothing but watch her and pray she is not hurting. I have to ask to touch or comfort my baby instead of rubbing my tummy when she is restless. It does not help that I am in so much pain from the c-section either. I do not remember being in so much pain with any of the others. Well I am wiped out so I am off to bed.

1 comment:

Heather said...

im sorry you feel that way dani! but i think its a normal reaction when a baby comes so early. hang in there, get yourself better, and watch your little girl thrive. in time it will get better.

hope your recovery goes better...a c/s is no fun to recover from. but im sure its been an emotional journey as well. hugs mama!